Well my holiday didnt go as planned, instead of gifts this year it was divorce papers on the 28th.
I am an army combat veteran and have been in bad situations but this was heart stopping and I felt like being stabbed in the back.
Our relationship (10 yrs together 7 married) had seemed pretty good we have a 4 year old boy a dog a nice little house in a nice little neighborhood.
I started an apprenticeship 3 yrs ago and have 1 more year to go till I become a journeyman and I think I was devoting to much of myself to my job (it is competitive) and I started forgetting the small things like saying I love you when getting home from work and hugging and our sex life was hurting but I had asked for 1 more year to get out of my apprenticeship and devote more time to my family and to her but it was not to be I guess.
About a week after getting served I went out to my car( after having a bad conversation with my wife) and was going to shoot myself, luckily I looked up and saw my son waving at me from the window and smiling so I stopped what I was doing and went back inside and hugged him the next day I had more dark thoughts and some family came over and I went to the V.A. mental health clinic where luckly I got the help and medication I need to function and help keep the bad thoughts away.
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I moved in with my parents so they could keep an eye on me gave all my guns to my uncle for a while and I am doing okay still very sad and lost luckly my thoughts dont go to suicide but every time I tellmy wife my emotions my willingness to become a better father and husband to change what I was is met with a black face and no answer
I’m trying to pull myself together but it is hard, for other veterans maybe going thru this here is a number to call 1-800-273-8255 it’s the veterans crisis line for vets and their families I hope it helps